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Blog Launch! (Blaunch?)

So. I've been taking a break from twitter for all of like, 48 hours, and I've had this epiphany. You know what the world needs most right now?


Another white bitch with a blog.


Jk. The truth is, even though I've been spending too much time on twitter lately, even though it's been stressing me out, and even though my stress levels have improved in the few days I've been away, being away from twitter has reminded me of why I started being active on twitter in the first place. I need an outlet. I have a million zany thoughts a day, and if I don't tell them to someone, they'll pile up in my head until I explode. And so, rather than annoy the shit out of my IRL friends by texting them a million half-baked non-sequitur brain-farts out of left field, I started tweeting.


In the beginning, twitter was simply a pillow for me to scream into. It was a gaping abyss, big enough to hold all my ill-conceived jabberings, allowing me to chatter away to my heart's content without annoying anyone. And then, by a series of strange coincidences, I started meeting people and making friends ON TWITTER! I've met some of the sweetest, silliest people online, and we've had a great time. But this is 2020. I've been doomscrolling incessantly for six months, and my heart is tired. What used to be an outlet has become an inlet— a way for pain, anger, and fear to get into my heart. And to some extent, that's ok. Under the present circumstances, if you're not hurt, angry, and afraid, well, I don't know what to tell you. But enough is enough, and for me, the level of indiscriminate hot-take consumption I've been imbibing this year has definitely been more than enough. I still need an outlet, though. In the two days I haven't tweeted, I've already subjected my IRL friends to dozens of annoying-ass messages nobody asked for. "Beverly don't be so hard on yourself, your friends don't think you're annoying." Wanna bet??


You get the idea. I. Need. An. Outlet. And twitter is undoubtedly the medium best suited to serve as a pressure valve for these momentary sparks of worthless nonsense. Twitter is perfectly optimized to exorcise these kinds of individual ill-considered thoughts from one's brain, on a granular level with which no other media can compete. But what if I could conserve those sparks of nonsense? Instead of unleashing my thoughts indiscriminately upon whichever friend I haven't annoyed yet today, what if I consolidated them into a blog? Would it be funny? Could it be poignant? Can I even do it in the first place? Dunno. We'll see.

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